a little of myself a little of just now a little everywhere

just went to onsight with chow and vincent.. that place so boring! maybe because it's new, they have yet bring in "life" to their tiles and gym....

even when the gym is not that fun i still enjoyed myself...

- i realise i don't just love climbing.. i love the companies..

gg to brunei, jcc, soon.. so excited and very nervous..

so now i'm officially left with 8 more days, a spoiled bb(damn the customer service center), a broken toe nail and some anxiety before i fly off to lakiun camp...

i want it.. desperately for the badge to be sewed on my smartest 4.. but then again it's not the pride i'm heading and reaching.. it's the experience.. the decision to be specific.. i want to come to a point where i, being physically tired yet, make that decision to press on.. - to move on

never i want to look back thinking i could have got it.. i want to look back, i did it....

recently, while searching for my stuff in my garang guni room, found my kk ltc trip's diary..(actually i only wrote a few sentences).. read what jacob left for me back at sabah.. a quote that change my life..

"going outdoor to find yourself again" -jacob...

it seems a little familiar.. like gg to the wilderness to wrestle for 40 days.. haha...

it makes a picture.. He taught me a lesson...

i guess the desire to impress have overtaken the desire to excel..

now i'm gg back to the basic, to the start, to the heart... and really move on this time...

Moments where i sit around with my friend.. letting time pass us by.. waiting for something to happen..

a motivation

"All right, they're on our left, they're on our right, they're in front of us, they're behind us...they can't get away this time."

- lewis "chesty" puller

Lieutenant General, US marine corps

I really wonder if i can pick up my courage and make such quote in times of pressure?

I'm really sick of those so called officers....... refresh, restart, reboot, recharge my mind.. tune it to Your frequency..

april 16, little soul to soul

again this date.. haha...

many event to update
-enlist ocs
-did a 28 days RCP and total 32 days in camp stay
-just 1 more week to pro term

i wonder what really motivates me(that much)?

anxiety about the future..
so truthfully, i asked myself, i'm running this race for a greater purpose or just matching my self-esteem? is again the pride issue...

why is EVERYONE so prideful bout their success? you should know very clearly the moments you stop, prolong, to celebrate your present victory is also time that you're wasting away to getting closer to your finishing line..
gotta stop dwelling on our pass successes..

the future is filled with uncertainty, that alone makes living... fun.



i splinter my life in front of You just so You can glue me back with love.

messed up

part of this world but not of this world ; i'm

i wasn't aware that 2010 is coming to an end till i read the many fb status.. i was fb stalking everyone, all.. haha..

i'm updated and tune myself a little nearer to this world..

tired... tired about everything that's constantly circling my mind.. i need to steer my mind and set it on a right path... i need to break free...

freedom without limits.

christmas.. love and sharing..

-it's gonna be christmas in a few hours time

-it's gonna be my 8th week in bmt

both must be celebrated, exaggeratingly.

i'm actually staring at my army phone constantly waiting for smses in camp, like some noob. haha.. i'm hoping there are more messages for me to read, at least then, i won't realise that i've already detached from the world.

i try to find the balance. meeting as much friends i can every book out. it makes me feel a little more connected this way. i guess that SOL week really pinch me hard, (sol- stoppages of leaves.. I MISFIRED!) it's such a sad friday when i called my mum to inform her i won't be booking out. i tear..

ahha sounds like some sad story.. but guess what.. my mum is just epic.... she"nvm lor.. i finally can have 1 weekend for myself" follows by a.. HAHAH.....

completely spoils mood....

希望 和 期待

i miss you

beginning and ending...

i'm enlisting army in about 8hrs time... a little everything i'm feeling..

nervous, scared, excited, tired, hungry

to be exact and factual, lost....

闭上眼, 用心想着明天时

明天... 在睁开眼后, 来了..